Wet Hot Summer
Despite the constant deluge of rain here in Michigan, it’s finally beginning to feel like summer and what with the United States being fully reopened for vaccinated adults (at least for most states at the time being) the prophecies of a “summer of sex” seem to be coming to fruition. People are more free to see people after the long period of solitude and are excited to swing the pendulum back to indulgence. An energy of boldness, experimentation, and acting on whims is filling the public unconscious beyond the normal warm weather hormones1. Last month The Guardian published an article about this “New Summer of Love” and told, via anecdotes and statistics (app downloads, condom sales, and increasing attendance at organized sex parties to name a few), how there is a noted increased desire for physical touch and intimacy from even pre-lockdown numbers. Hearing anecdotes and testimonials from friends and acquaintances only confirms this. The people are horny.
So I’m gonna talk about erotic thrillers you can watch at home.
Erotic thrillers (also known as sex thrillers) are a subgenre of thrillers with explicit themes of eroticism, sexuality, and illicit affairs. Often, these films bare a striking narrative similarity to film noirs and include their own versions of the femme fatale. Works in this genre range from trashy (Wild Things2) to art-house (A Bigger Splash3) to somewhere in-between (Body Heat4 and, my personal favorite, Basic Instinct5). Inciting incidents are usually the result of one or more of it’s characters giving into illicit sexual desires and, more often than not, this leads to murder.
Take for example the awesome new release on the Criterion Collection that I picked up, La Piscine (1969), a film about a beautiful French couple, Jean-Paul (Alain Delon) and Marianne (Romy Schneider), vacationing at a gorgeous villa who’s lives are disrupted by an extended visit from their old friend Harry (Maurice Ronet) and his 18-year-old daughter Penelope (Jane Birkin). Sexual tensions rise out of simmering stares, revealing clothes, and rumors in every scene. The uninhibited desire may or may not have been fully acted on (sex scenes are hinted at, but hardly even implied, which is unusual for the genre), so La Piscine let’s the audience’s own desires decide. Scenes fraught with sexual tension are cut-off right before a clear decision has been made. These potential indulgences are what end up causing an inevitable crime of passion, a murder. Writer Brianna Zigler discusses the inherent sexuality of the film in her write-up of it for Paste Magazine and compares this film, and films like it, to today’s culture:
It is an interesting film to consider when compared to the state of cinema today, where perfectly sculpted action hero bodies proliferate cineplexes as the ideal of the human form—fully clothed, PG-13 weapons that should demand to be embraced yet don’t partake in acts of intimacy. Instead, they operate in service of the American government, completely bereft of the natural sensuality their taut bodies might exude. And despite how sexless popular cinema has become, there is still an undaunted crusade against sex and sexuality in cinema. Indeed, it seems as if every week, someone goes viral for arguing that there is still too much sex in film—that sex scenes are “unnecessary” and “don’t progress the plot.”
So what gives? In a summer where people are as horned up as they are, the only movie out right now with people in swimsuits takes place on a beach that makes you old? I’m going to slightly alter a John Water’s quote here and give some advice to everyone for this summer of love: “Get more out of life. See a sexy movie."6
La Piscine is not available for streaming anywhere, but is now available for DVD and Blu-Ray purchase from The Criterion Collection and other online/physical stores.
Run Like the Wind
TW: This article contains mention of suicide
M. Night Shyamalan has a new horror/thriller out in theaters, Old, based on the French graphic novel, Sandcastle by Frederik Peeters and Pierre Oscar Lévy. While there have been plenty of memes about the central plot, a beach that makes you old, trusted sources close to I Liked It! have reported that they didn’t like it. The complaints levied at Old included poor dialogue, weird acting, a heavy handed moral, and general stupidity. All of which weirdly made me interested in the film because it reminds me of Shyamalan’s 2008 film with poor dialogue, weird acting, a heavy handed moral, and general stupidity: The Happening.
Now I mean no disrespect here, I think Shaymalan’s first four thrillers are great, with The Village and Signs being standouts, and I haven’t seen much of his later work outside of the schlocky fun of Split, but The Happening is one of my favorite bad movies ever. I must have watched it a dozen times back when I was in high school just to dunk on it with friends.
Without getting into spoilers, since Shyamalan’s films often deal with twists, The Happening follows high school science teacher Elliot Moore (a wildly miscast Mark Wahlberg), his wife Alma Moore (Zooey Deschanel), and a rotating cast of other survivors trying to navigate a seemingly supernatural event. Something is causing large swathes of people to commit suicide in public.
The depiction of the victims of this so-called happening is often harrowing. Seeing a legion of construction workers leap off the side of a building at the beginning of the film would set the film up to be a dire and grim story, but it ends up being far from it because of the cornball dialogue and silly performances. Shyamalan has stated that The Happening, which he wrote, directed, and produced, was meant to evoke sci-fi films of the 50s and 60s like The Birds and The Blob and, as a result, the shaky science and the campy dialogue make the film more farcical than frightening. Shyamalan wanted to have a slight comedic tone despite the bleak subject matter, but even admitted to Vulture magazine that in terms of tone “I think I was inconsistent. That’s why [audiences] couldn’t see it.”
Compared to other post-9/11 sci-fi disaster allegories, like Stephen Spielberg’s War of the Worlds7 remake, The Happening is clearly pure camp. Wahlberg delivers all his lines with an unintentional insincere tone and appropriately reacts to every non-sequitur lobbed his way with comedic befuddlement. Nearly every supporting character ranges from total clown to strange idiot. Despite everything, it’s an unintentional comedy that, after rewatching this week, remains totally fun to watch, even if it is stupid and bad.
So maybe if it’s anything like The Happening, I’ll give Old a chance.
The Happening is available for digital rental on most streaming services.
Stray Observations
Something that was intentionally stupid that I watched was the brilliant comedy show Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace. Only six 30 minute episodes long and filled to burst with ironic comedy. Stars Matthew Holness as the titular Garth Marenghi, a horror writer who stars as the hero of the show Darkplace, a supernatural hospital show. The show focuses on this fictional show and cuts away to interviews from the fictional cast and crew about the “making of”. The show within the show is so surreal, stupid, and cheap looking, making it an easy mine for comedy. Also stars Richard Ayoade8, Matt Berry, and Alice Lowe. Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace is available for streaming on Amazon Prime.
In my anticipation for Kanye’s latest album, Donda, and amusement over his new position as The Phantom of the Mercedes-Benz Stadium since performing a sneak peek of the album there, I’ve been revisiting his previous albums. As always, I’m particularly fond of My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy for its self-effacing lyrics and for great guest spots (Nicki Minaj’s killer verse in “Monster” and Jay-Z goofy verse in “Monster”). Other tracks of his on repeat for me right now are “Waves” from The Life of Pablo, “Street Lights” from 808s & Heartbreak, and his hopeful/sorrowful collaboration with Paul McCartney, “Only One”. Anyway, here’s a picture of Kanye lurking around Mercedes-Benz stadium. Donda is expected (at the time of this writing) to be released August 6th.
One reader pointed out that in my last issue where I praised Jon Hamm’s comedic chops in guest roles on TV shows, I neglected to mention his eccentric turn as Richard Wayne Gary Wayne in the incredible Netflix Original Series Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Thanks Molly for pointing out this egregious error.
It’s my birthday! Technically, tomorrow (August 1st) is my birthday, but who cares for technicalities like that. Consider throwing a few bucks my way via my Ko-fi, shooting a happy birthday message to Nick.dauphin@gmail.com, or commenting on this post. Thanks for reading my newsletter!
One of my all time favorite Onion articles, “Revealing Spring Attire Reminds Man He Nothing More Than Weak Hormonal Ogre” addresses the reason why these feelings come during the warmer months better than any sociologist could.
Wild Things (1998) is available for digital rental on most streaming services. It is unbelievably trashy Florida noir. To say anything about the plot would spoil too much because half of the fun is the increasing amount of plot twists as the film goes on.
A Bigger Splash (2015) is available for digital rental on most streaming services. A Bigger Splash is a remake of La Piscine, but with an equally attractive cast of Tilda Swinton, Matthias Schoenaerts, Ralph Fiennes, and Dakota Johnson. Plot is pretty much the same, but the characters are much more filled out and their sexual exploits are made more explicit. Has a fun rock-and-roll energy to it until the tragedy strikes. Directed by Luca Guadagnino who directed Call Me By Your Name (2017) and the Suspiria remake.
Body Heat (1981) is available for streaming on The Criterion Channel. It’s a sort of sex thriller reimagining of the noir classic Double Indemnity with the backdrop of a sweaty Florida summer heat wave. A man begins an affair with a beautiful woman who wants him to kill her husband. It’s sexy, it’s dreamy, it’s sensual, and it’s a kickass noir.
Basic Instinct (1992) is available for digital rental on most streaming services. Directed by the Dutch master Paul Verhoeven, Basic Instinct is a pulpy San Francisco noir that pits Detective Nick Curran (Michael Douglas) up against one of the greatest femme fatales of all time, Catherine Trammell (Sharon Stone giving one of the greatest performances of all time). Trammell is suspected of killing her rich boyfriend mid-coitus and it is up to Curran to determine the truth, but he gets a little too involved. It’s one of my absolute favorite movies ever, but first time I watched it I hated it.
The original quote being “Get more out of life. See a fucked-up movie.”
War of the Worlds (2005) is available for digital rental on most streaming services. Actually really good and grim, but still hopeful.
Richard Ayoade directed all six episodes of Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace and would go on to direct the great coming-of-age film Submarine (2010) based on the book of the same name. Stylish, quirky, and emotionally stunted, but in a funny way. Submarine is available for digital rental on most streaming services.